I am an artist

Not sure why this was posted at the register of this Korean diner, but it seemed like a good photo op!

While some of us are very comfortable making that declaration, I have struggled to claim that label most of my life, and I know others have, too. Let's talk about why.

Unlike "firefighter" or "businessman," the "artist" seems to constantly have to justify our chosen title and path, which is fraught with misunderstanding. On the one hand, we are perceived to possess mythical powers referred to as "talent" that set unrealistic expectations and seem to separate us from mere mortals. On the other, we are stigmatized as frivolous, spacey, or unrealistic in our goals and pursuits. Therefore, many of us relegate art to a "side hustle" or hobby, which often takes a backseat to our "real" jobs.

The interesting thing is that all children begin life as artists. Scribbling and drawing are natural steps in processing life and learning to write. Some of us are encouraged to build on that innate motivation and we develop our skills through instruction, experience and practice, practice, practice. But most adults lose touch with their artistic selves somewhere between elementary school and college, concluding from their life experiences that they are "just not good at art."

This dilemma came into sharper focus on a recent trip to Korea. Travelling with my husband, who taught in an international college program for a month, we all visited a fan museum to learn about the significance of fans in Korean traditional culture. Upon arrival, we were met with tables full of supplies and inspirational imagery, then handed a blank fan and told to "make it our own."

What a revealing experience! I've never seen so many grown adults freeze in fear of having to use art supplies--without instruction no less! One of the professors left the building and didn't even attempt the project. At the same time, people crowded around me and others whom they labeled "artist" with oohs, ahs, and camera clicks. Those who struggled experienced the shame they probably felt as a child, while those who were complimented likely experienced validation.

I think my struggle with the label "artist" has to do with this socialization and validation. I want to create art, not for profit or positive attention, but for my own sense of expression and satisfaction. While I admit to a predisposition towards art and encouragement from others from a young age, I maintain that I do not possess mythical "talent." Instead, I received instruction and courageously accepted the process of trial and error that often leads to more failure than success in achieving my vision. As an introvert, I do not enjoy the attention shown towards my "successes." I just want to have a thoughtful conversation about my ideas, and I want to know what others think, too. I also find joy in connections formed over a piece of artwork that resonates with others.

I'm therefore curious what you all think about this subject. Are you one who gave up on art a long time ago? Do you long to regain the internal motivation you had as a child to create art? Are you struggling to identify as an artist yourself? Have you sidelined your art in order to pursue a more legitimate career? Please comment below--working as an artist can be very isolating and I'd love to hear what you have to say!